January 1, 2013
Some people may wonder why prioritizing the erotic is important. Many people see the erotic as a partitioned section of life that is not the most important or valuable aspect of life. I disagree. I believe that being connected to the erotic can infuse all of life with our own unique creative power, passion and energy. I believe connecting to the erotic and to pleasure in our lives is a creative jet-pack fuel that can transform the quality of life itself.
We must each find what connecting to the erotic looks like for ourselves. How we open to that which awakens our erotism is a deeply personal path that takes radical honesty with oneself, compassion, curiosity and open mindedness. I am certain that being open to learning and observing what wakes the erotic within us is an inquiry that reaps great rewards all through life.
This erotic inquiry challenges us to connect with our authenticity. Each of us has our own unique constellation of erotic pleasures. Only you can give yourself permission to explore the potential of your own eroticism.
Being connected to the erotic doesn’t have to look any particular way from the outside. It doesn’t have to look like you are hyper sexualized constantly, as culture tells us it is to be sexy. It does mean that you are paying attention to what sparks your erotic interest and choose to engage with it, whether that is an idea, a vision, a person, an image, a scent or an experience. It means that you allow yourself to feel interest, desire, longing, and allow yourself to linger there a little, to savor it. It means that you do not turn away from that which wakes you, but turn towards it and permit yourself to interact. It means that you allow yourself to be fueled by that which you find erotic. Not that you necessarily consume the object of your erotic interest each and every time, but merely remove the blocks to it and allow eroticism to be present.
Audre Lorde agrees and writes about this quality of opening to genuine erotic life and how that impacts all of life.
“During World War II, we bought sealed plastic packets of white, uncolored margarine, with a tiny, intense pellet of yellow coloring perched like a topaz just inside the clear skin of the bag. We would leave the margarine out for a while to soften, and then we would pinch the little pellet to break it inside the bag, releasing the rich yellowness into the soft pale mass of margarine. Then taking it carefully between our fingers, we would knead it gently back and forth, over and over, until the color had spread throughout the whole pound bag of margarine, thoroughly coloring it.
I find the erotic such a kernel within myself. When released from its intense and constrained pellet, it flows through and colors my life with a kind of energy that heightens and sensitizes and strengthens all my experience.”
– Audre Lorde, Uses of the Erotic: The Erotic as Power
Have you experienced connecting to the erotic in your life in this way? When you have felt erotically alive, have you felt more alive in general?
Does that motivate you to want to be more erotically alive to experience life more fully?
Share your thoughts in the comments, I’d adore to hear your reflections on this!
I hope you have a wonderful week filled with erotic awareness and notice how it fuels you!
Sending love with a dash of curiosity your direction,
Charlotte Mia Rose
January 3, 2013